Large vs. Small

When I joined our church over 30 years ago, the membership was much larger than it is today. This decline has affected all aspects of church including the number of young people I work with through our Youth Ministry. At one point in the last few years, we only had 4 regular members of the Youth group. For this time, we are considered a "small" church. We have a beautiful, large building, but do not have the members to fill it.

I often wondered what I could do to help increase the numbers but also worried that perhaps I was doing something which kept them away. But now, I recognize that it's not "all about me". Most of the youth have been members of the church since they were children and it has been a natural progression that they come to our group when they reach 6th grade. 

As time has passed, I have learned to love small groups. Our meetings are much more intimate and we truly are involved with each other. I'm invited to sporting events, birthday parties, graduations, etc. Not because they have to, because they want me there. If our group was huge, I doubt the impact would be the same. But does that mean I have given up on increasing the number we reach? No, if that is meant to happen, it will. The love of small groups means that I have the unique opportunity to really make a difference in the lives of a few rather than just being the "leader" of many. They know me, where I live, where I work (full time), my husband, my grandson, my children...they know how I live my life. It has been a wondrous discovery to realize that God has blessed me with young people who want to be involved with each other, with me and with our community.

 This is part of an article dealing with large vs. small church from a pastors perspective...it was worth sharing...by Daniel Darling:

Where God dwells

Ultimately, ministry jealousy stems from a faulty view of God. During my time on staff at a large church, I mistakenly thought that God only worked through the most cutting edge, organized, streamlined ministries. It's the same misguided view I carried into my experience pastoring a small church.

But Scripture tells us something far different. As Paul reminded the Corinthians, God often works through the "foolish" and "weak" things of this world. Abraham was an impotent pagan whom God raised up to father the nation of Israel. David was the least likely to succeed in his family and yet became King of Israel. Gideon was trembling in fear when the angel of the Lord called him a "mighty warrior." Moses was well past his prime when he led the Israelites out of Egypt. The list goes on.

This is not to say we shouldn't pray for big things to happen in our small churches. But the question is this: what do we consider big? For instance, this year we baptized eight people. For some mega churches, that's the conversion rate of one small group in one weekend. But for these eight people in our congregation, it was a mighty work of God. Heaven's chorus is no less triumphant over one soul than it is over thousands.

I think of the man who stumbled into our humble church a few months ago. His life had fallen apart. One of our elders led him to faith in Christ and this man's faith has grown tremendously. Nowhere in his story will you year anything about how streamlined our programs were or how slick our Sunday morning presentations are (because they are not). What he found in our church was a relationship with Jesus Christ. He found community. He is receiving the vital words of life from Scripture that are empowering his transformation.

Leading....

Excellent article for those of us who love and work with young people (read the whole thing!).

This experience sparks in my some reflection on what kind of leadership we need to build bridges with the non-churched populations with which we interact on a daily basis (as well as the Christian community in place that we fail to guide).

1. what is our touchstone? — a touchstone tests the quality or purity of a substance or thing.  What is our touchstone?  What standards do we hold one another accountable to as we promote Christian growth and maturity?  What are we hoping to help people become?  What attitudes and behaviors will we challenge to help people grow and mature?
2. how will we shepherd? — is our job just to mingle with the sheep or are we guiding, directing, prodding, nurturing and leading to greener pastures?  When we see our charges — young or otherwise — straying into dangerous territory, what is our role and responsibility?  The care and feeding of young faiths is important work, and helping those newer to the faith to discern the differences between acceptable and unacceptable behavior is crucial.
3. what is our witness?  — how are we modeling the attitudes, actions, and practices we hope to encourage in young believers?  Just as there are sins of omission, there are also powerful blessings of omission — refusing to enter into gossip, backstabbing, mocking, insulting, cursing, and mud-slinging.  Modeling a respectful, kind, generous, encouraging and affirming worldview can be a mighty witness to counter the behaviors deemed acceptable in a broken and dysfunctional world.
4. how are we different? — when I studied young spiritual seekers, one of the most prevalent desires was connection to a counter-cultural community operating by Biblically based core values of tolerance, acceptance, decency, compassion, love, gentleness and sacrificial giving.  When our leaders do not offer a counter-cultural option for young people, why should they ever bother changing, growing, progressing or becoming better than they already are?

I am not saying that leaders with young people should be perfect, but I do believe we owe it to the kingdom/kin-dom of God to provide a better way.  When we encounter toxic and destructive words, behaviors, and attitudes, the very least we can do is confront and challenge.  There are some basics that should just be universal givens: (think fruit) love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control — not to mention mercy, compassion, grace, tolerance, caring and sharing.  This isn’t rocket-science.  Being good, being kind, not doing harm — these are the things we have to offer young people in a contentious, dangerous, and often unkind world.

Small youth groups

I had the privilege of teaching a workshop during Warmth in Winter (our local conference winter retreat for youth) a couple of years ago. It was geared toward adult leaders and was a "new" experience for me! The title was "Single Digit YouthMinistries". My first statement was "If you came to this workshop to have me tell youhow to take a small youth group and build it into a large one, you're in the wrong place!" I'm glad to say that no one walked out! If you think about it, in large churches, the first thing they do in Youth ministry is to divide the young people into "small" groups based on age, grade or other criteria. Our small group is ready made.

Although the congregation of most every church would love to have a Youth group with 50 or 100 young people, my passion is for smaller gatherings. Having a group our size allows me (and the other adults) to be in relationship with all the young people...no one gets lost in the shuffle. We can know about what happens in their lives, what is important to them, what scares or hurts them...and we're in a place to help them address it.

There have been times in the past that I would fret about not reaching a larger group and questioned if I was the right person for the job. But then I realized, this is NOT a job to me, it's a mission, it's my way of reaching out and I am blessed to be in relationship with these people. It's our desire to reach the ones we have rather than be concerned about the ones we don't. Besides, when Jesus called His disciples, He only called 12!


Do you think numerical growth is the only indicator of a healthy Youth ministry? Numbers can be an indicator but it's not a decisive one. "Fun" youth group meetings can attract larger numbers but ministry is not all about games. It must include spiritual growth and spiritual growth is solely a work of the Holy Spirit in a person's life. If a healthy group is not growing, could it be because God's plan for us right now is to be diligent in focusing on the students who are already here? Perhaps there are ways He wants us to grow that would not be possible in a group where we can't truly know each one by name.

There is nothing we can do to force a young person to grow. The best we can do is pray like their lives depend on it (because they do) and seek the Lord's wisdom in creating environments that encourage their spiritual growth. Beyond that, we must remain open for the Lord to use us however possible in communicating His Truth and let Him be the one that makes the Truth penetrate their hearts and souls.


"We" means the entire adult congregation, not just the youth workers. Won't you add your prayers or pass along an idea to help us nurture them? We are blessed because this is a ministry that needs all of us.

 

Mosaics

A friend and fellow Youth Worker posted this on his FB page. There's much truth here!

 

Are you a Trader?

Right after I finished with this mornings post about United Methodists being Missional, I ran across this video from Rethinking Youth Ministry about teaching our young people to be missional. Since I found it quite interesting and since I also believe that coincidences are exceptionally rare, I wanted to share it with you...

What does it mean to be missional? Ask 3 youth ministers and you'll get five different answers. For me, being missional means centering yourself, your ministry, your faith, your life in the mission of God. This video seems to be right in line with that understanding. What do you think? Would this video's message resonate with your youth?

Youth Leaders

Finally, someone has managed to describe our world...

Attendance

All youth leaders struggle with attendance. When my children were young, I could control when and where they went...what they focused on and whether or not they attended the church youth program. I guess that's been the hardest part for me...having a parent come to me and say, "I just can't convince my child to come..." Perhaps I was wrong, but there was no convincing...they were expected to attend unless there was an unusual circumstance. Imagine how thrilled I was when they hit high school, got their license and chose to be at the youth meetings.

I know that there are other things pulling on the young people...other commitments, other desires but as a parent I felt it was my responsibility to help them balance...after all, they would soon be out from under my wings and making all their own decisions. YouthWorker Movement has a good article addressing this issue:

And on that day that you come to me, wondering why college Johnny isn’t interested in church or God or helping others any more, I probably won’t point out that while we were on mission trip he was doing chin-ups 9 weeks before his next game or memorizing marching patterns for a 3 minute halftime show two months away. Or that while we were doing a youth leadership devotion on the importance of the practice of prayer he was deciding on his favorite scene from “The Hangover” with his buddies in the weight room. But that’s what happened. Or at least part of it.

Read the rest here....

Youth...

Following in the footsteps of Pope John Paul II, Pope Benedict XVI has a wonderful message for young people in this age where technology connects as well as isolates us. I am sure neither of them meant this message only for Catholic youth...

"You are good. You are loved. You are created for a purpose. You are more than pop culture. You are greater than the temptations of the age. You are the ongoing affirmation of unique individualism. Jesus loves you, He calls you. Do Not Be Afraid."