Worth...

Except for my husband, everyone who knows me today thinks me to be an extrovert. I can approach most anyone and start a conversation. I can speak in front of 5, or 50, or 500, it makes no matter. But it wasn't always so...

Due to the circumstances of my nature and childhood, I was an excruciatingly shy child and teenager. Not only could I NOT speak in front of people, I spent most of my time trying to be invisible. It was so much easier if nobody noticed me. Looking back, I had no idea how worthless I thought I was. Isn't it funny how much easier it is to believe someone who says bad things about you?

God was not happy with me...but He didn't give up on me either. I say He wasn't happy, that's probably not an accurate statement, I'm sure I broke His heart...everyday. He had created me, loved me, held me, comforted me and yet I doubted Him. It's all part of the thinking...why would the Creator of the Universe even cast an eye toward me?

It took a long time for me to get to this point, but God is nothing if not patient. He put me with a husband and a family who wouldn't let me think less of myself than they did.

He does have a way of giving us exactly what we need, when we need it, if we but let Him. Are you standing in His way? I was.

In the end I understood that it wasn't me that was worthless, it was my attitude toward me. I cannot possibly conceive what my worth is to Him, but that doesn't matter. He knows and I'm so glad ...