Unbelief...

I have struggled with unbelief most of my adult life. Does that mean I don't believe in Jesus? Absolutely not...but do I trust Him with my whole heart? I read the following poem recently and it drove home what I am doing to God each and every time I refuse to let go and let God:
Live for yourself and yourself alone,
for yourself and none beside.
Just as if Jesus had never lived,
and as if He had never died.

How many times have I disappointed Him because I worried, spoke hastily, acted out of turn and any number of other ways I have shown my lack of faith? Not sure if you've done the same? Read: Mark 9:24, Romans 4:20, 11:20, 11:23 and Hebrews 3:19...these may open your eyes. I remind myself that I am if I am faithful He will be with me, to comfort, to guide, to teach, to protect, to love, to forgive. The last one, to forgive, is my saving grace. He does so, time and again...Father, forgive my unbelief.